The owl and the pussycat
Went to sea
In a beautiful catamaran.
Cold Turkey on hill
Felt pea-green envy;
Vengeance served as you’d cater meringue.
Dish best served cold
Saw bay ring with ice scream:
Fowl play schemed owl and cat to maroon.
The puss flowed quite yellow,
A snotty-teared fellow:
Face couldn’t have catarrh more on.
They’d plotted Bahrain
And less snotted (bar rain)
Brain might’ve viewed Qatar more wrong…
When he’d pigged all his sorbet
Wrapped up in note gourmet,
The owl called the cat a moron!
"Moor on?"
"Yes! You got the drift... a moron!"
"Moor on?"
"Yes! You got the drift... a moron!"
I first began this poem on the 12th of May 2012 to commemorate the centenary of Edward Lear’s birth, the archetypal poet of nonsense rhymes most famous for this work I’ve finally parodied. My memory being all at sea like one of his sieves I’d left it till now to complete, but the howler was over the idea of keeping up a thankless rhyme scheme with the ‘catamaran’ my long-infantile mind had thought a pussycat should more properly sail in when I first heard of the pea-green boat in my childhood! Hope you enjoyed all the not-half-tenuous references, including to a fiver?
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